The Ethics of Lying to Children

Dear Renaldo The: 

You say that telling a child that God exists is tantamount to child abuse, but do you even care that children who are suffering or terminally ill are comforted by being told that God loves them and that there's an end of their pain in heaven?  

Cindy

Hi Cindy, 

Wow... Great question! In fact I think the only good case for god can be made by the need to comfort sick children. Ironically, Darwin himself lost his final remnant of faith upon hearing of the death of his most beloved daughter, what kind of god could justify a protracted illness and excruciating death?

I turn my thoughts to my own children and if they were near death I would not hesitate to tell them super-natural "stories" of our reunification and the cessation of their suffering. Sadly that does not make the "stories" true. What is true however is that for whatever reason we humans can deeply love each other if we so choose. The power of blood and idea-kinship far outstrips the centrality of any individual and is in a real way a "higher power" without subordinating itself to fantasy.

The plight of dying children does not so much make me wish to lie about metaphysical absurdities as much as it creates in me a desire to help alleviate and prevent untimely, unnecessary, unjust suffering or death in this life.

In that breath it is every persons responsibility who has it within their means to help those who can not help themselves, create less suffering and spread real education and free-thinking. In that same way it seems that one of the greatest responsibilities we each shoulder is to examine our limiting beliefs. I have been led to a sense that all metaphysics are nonsense and only serve to oppress the minds that are molded under it's foot if taken literally.

I would also offer that as a child of an Orthodox Christian Priest I was deeply invested in the belief that god was real and present. However even as a child, I was ever aware of the cracks in that "truth." It seemed to me that we were still just grass swaying in the wind and subjects of "natural laws." All our bluster to claim knowledge of the wind's origin was pretty weak and ultimately ridiculous.

So comforting a dying child is the line I would cross where I would lie but something in me suspects the child would know it's pataphysical, well-intentioned but dishonest. Yes, I would say anything I could to comfort a dying child.

The knowledge that we're profoundly connected by our natural love for each other would at least be true.

Tough One either way.

-Renaldo THE